cScott's Babylon 5 Parodies


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"Psi Corps Anthem"

by Al Bester

to the tune of "Camp Grenada" by Alan Sherman

Corps is Mother, Corps is Father
Can't escape it, so don't bother
We will help you with your training
And we'll change your mind if you feel like complaining.

Welcome to our Psi Corps city
Don't our wall plaques look so pretty
They're not just for decoration
Cause they help assure complete indoctrination.

Students test their mental power
They must practise for an hour
This may seem like barbarism
But it's better than the risk of aneurysm.

Some rogues try to terminate you
And the mundanes fear and hate you
It's confirmed by propaganda
Verified by our internal memoranda.

Who would leave, our safe protection
He just needs, some redirection
Bring him home, try not to hurt him
So that we can fix his troubled mind.

Now we go, before the mundanes interfere
This is our problem, make it clear
We don't need them to stay
Just keep out of our way.

Now we've tracked him, to that station
(Such a source of irritation)
But the sooner we are starting
Then the sooner we are happily departing.

Our lost rogue is reunited,
With the family he has slighted,
We'll forgive him and embrace him
Not the mundane though, we'll have to hyper-space him.


from Episode 514: "The Corps is Mother, The Corps is Father. Now Clean your Room!"


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